Need to level up your #trbathwars game? 

Enjoy our whole range of either skin milk soaks or mag based muscle soaks. We've even increased the sample sizes and range - because we know size matters.

So what the fuck do you get?

1. Magnesium Muscle Soak Bundle: 5 x 200g muscle soaks (Lights Out, Reveille, Armoury, Casevac and EKO).
2. Skin Milk Soak Bundle: 3 x 200g milk soaks (Bail Out, Night Op and R&R). 
   
3. Why not both!? Can't choose and want all of our shit. Too easy. This pack includes both bundles. 
   

*Bundles are not eligible for discount codes to be applied. Because, hello - we would be fucking broke if we discounted the already...discounted products. We aren't the fucking Reject Shop. But, your muscles will fucking love you for treating them to this.

As we don’t use shit in our soaks (like preservatives) the milk soak has a short shelf life of approx 1 month. Or, it’ll smell like shit and be gross. But, you’ve bathed in worse, right? 

Read this far? You attentive dirtbag. Want to be in on a secret? We're nearly ready to release our mag shower gel and mag infused coffee scrubs. Now you'll know what it's like treat yo' self - just like a RAAFY! P.s email us to get on the top-secret waitlist for pre-release. hello@tacticalrecovery.com.au , subject line: I keep secrets safe.

If you've been part of this salty pineapple tribe for a while, you would know by now that these hand-poured soy candles sell out, every god damn week. 

These are our old faithfuls. 

Our hand-poured soy candles are made from 100% soy wax and premium Australian made fragrances. The wicks are lead-free and they're non-toxic. Please note that the candles now coming in white tins, like our new Luxe Illum Rounds. Our photographer is as lazy as a front gate guard, so the image hasn't 

Your weapons of choice:

• On Rotation - Monthly Candle - so these bad boys rotate each month and, most of the time, are in short-run batches. It's the luck of the draw. October = Grapefruit, lime & coconut twist,  spiced woods, hot jam donut or a nostalgic sour candy.
• Coffee- if you aren't a coffee lover, then move the fuck along (and, get off our website, ok?). This gives you a total faux sense of being perky as fuck. Our new blend isn't as sweet and is a much more bold black coffee brew.
• Creme Brulee - literally these names are exactly how they smell. The purpose of writing these descriptions is a bit pointless hey. This one is sweet, with creamy vanilla and very decadent. We know ya'll like snacky-snacks, and this one - is a lil snack of its own. 
• Aussie Flora - this light scent is laced with Australian botanicals. Not too strong, not too light. It's just right. 
  
• Dry Tobacco & Hay - if we had a dollar for every time some dickweed says "why would I want something that smells like an ashtray?". Firstly, hi - fucking dried tobacco and hay have a very earthy and sweet aroma. It's a very homely scent and surprising to those who aren't familiar with it. It's actually our best seller. So if you're a Karen - bye. 
  
• Spiced Pumpkin Pie - one of our last candles of the Winter Range left. This is reminiscent of cinnamon-dusted home-baked pumpkin pie. Someone did once say it reminded them of curried sausages. So, yeah look, everyone is different #scentdiversity
  
• Candle Snuffer - can be used as both a weapon and a candle snuffer, your choice really. However, we advise the later. These are 24cm long metal snuffers that reduce the smoke when you blow the candles out. If you want to give your candles a longer burn time and shelf life - this is a #lifehack.
  

Important shit. 

We've put these beauties into lightweight travel tins, which have a burn time of approx 18-20 +hrs. Contains 220g of soy wax + fragrance + our salty attitude. Our tins have changed to be white until further notice. Please don't reject us because of this.

NOTE: Always trim the wick down, otherwise the wick will be like a little mushroom, it'll burn like crap and then you'll be a sooky la la that your candle isn't performing well. So just trim it to 5mm before you burn each time. Oh, and, don't leave a candle unattended. If we don't put stupid disclaimers on things, we'll get sued by someone even stupider.  

2020 is a shit show, but our magnesium muscle spray isn't. 

Our magnesium oil spray can be used anywhere, anytime and unlike magnesium sulfate, magnesium chloride can absorb even deeper and faster into the skin, helping to target problem areas. You can't spray us all over your life - we won't fix that, but we can help to relieve muscle tightness, soreness, and headaches caused by constant clusterf*cks or poorly executed CrossFit workouts.

Our non-scented spray means we're covert as f*ck and our bottles are small enough to fit into your field kit, go-bags, doomsday prepper bunkers etc. We've upgraded our bottles to also have a trigger spray nozzle for extra misty goodness.

• Read the important shit below (literally)
• Spray onto your tight spots
• Massage it in
• Wipe the residue off & carry on with your day 
• For sleep: spray onto your stomach and massage gently. Or spray onto legs if you suffer restless legs when you sleep - which annoys the fuck out of everyone.

WHAT'S IN US:

These ingredients are more active than a WO2 headed for the fat truck.

• Magnesium chloride, purified water, sheer brilliance.

Important shit: some people may feel tingling or a slight itch which is normal from the natural active ingredient of magnesium chloride (like, this is pretty strong salt people). It's reported to be common amongst people who have a magnesium deficiency and isn't harmful.  Simply wipe the residue off. The magic happens during transdermal absorption when you're massaging it in. So if it tingles or gets itchy, simply wipe off as this won't impact its muscle relief effects. To relieve you can also rub coconut oil or your normal body lotion onto the area to soothe if required. Do not use on cuts or irritated skin because it will burn like a motherf*cker, and that would just be dumb of you. We warned you. If irritation occurs - cease use and seek medical advice. 

Geez, we've made a pretty bold call on this one and we're 96.3% sure we're right on the money. If not, we have absolutely no doubt a spousile (spouse missile) is headed straight for us. 

We're going to get you from highly strung, to undone; with our sleepy and calming muscle soak. 

We'll get you prepped and ready for a good slumber thanks to an infusion of chamomile and lavender - known for their sleep evoking superpowers, alongside mandarin and cedarwood.  If this doesn't unwind & relax you and get you ready for bedtime snacks and snugs we're not sure what will. 

Mission of this soak: to knock you the fuck out and help you sleep. 

GET NAKED AND:

• Put on your favourite playlist
• Chuck about 2 handfuls into the bath (or a small handful if you're just soaking your feet)
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for 20 minutes
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

TINY HEROES:

These ingredients are more active than Netflix during a pandemic.

• Magnesium sulfate, essential oils of English Lavender, Bergamot, Mandarin, Lemon, Chamomile and Cedarwood. 

Say hello to your new little friend. This bag of salty goodness is better than a 2am kebab.

We know days are spent on your feet and are relatively strenuous (unless you're in the RAAF), and the higher the tempo, the more repair and recovery time your body needs - which sometimes just isn't an option. 20 minutes is all you need along with some soothing Daryl Brathwaite in the background.

Your muscles will be thirsty for this zesty and deeply relaxing bag of goodness. This blend has been infused with hero essential oils of lavender, known for it's calming properties. Rosemary, which can assist in relieving muscular aches and pains. And, Eucalyptus which may help to promote blood flow, decongesting the airways and soothe tense muscles. Use as a whole body bath soak, or in a smaller tub as a pure foot soak.

Mission of this soak: to give your muscles the kick up the arse they need (oh, and to relax them). 

• Put on your favourite playlist
• Chuck about 2 handfuls into the bath (or a small handful if you're just soaking your feet)
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for 20 minutes
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

TINY HEROES:

• Magnesium sulfate, pure essential oils of rosemary, eucalyptus, lavender & lemon.

What do you get when you snitch on staff? Outcomes. You get fucking outcomes - which, in this case, are brand new Luxe Illumination Rounds.

Our Luxe Illumination Rounds are limited edition and, after much testing, arguing, further testing, nearly lighting the office on fire after leaving a candle unattended - we're pretty stoked about them. 

Your New Weapons Of Choice:

• Tiramisu: we know that most Officers have a sweet tooth (we've seen the drawers stashed full of lollies and shit), so it's only fitting we did another drool-worthy candle. 
• Blue Mountains Bushwalk smells like a fresh spring day with soft eucalyptus, native wattle, fresh leaves and pine.
• Choccie Milk + ADF = a match made in milky heaven. We'll fight you if you don't agree (also - our knees and back are fucked, so we'll need to just have a keyboard war, ok?)
• Deluxe Raspberry Ripple: this zingy little number will make the most foul-smelling of office blocks and rooms smell fucking delightful. Super fresh, super berry-ish and topped off with a hint of vanilla. 
• The Huntsmans Cabin: this Illumination Round will transport you deep into the woods with a base of sandalwood, juniper, cedarwood, cinnamon, and clove. Earthy, warm, and bloody delightful. 

P.s uh, we didn't just launch new candles either. We have a new motherfuckin' muscle soak! You can find it here.  Our Product & Op's team have finally worked a lil harder. And for that, our muscles and minds are forever grateful.

Important shit. 

We've put these beauties into lightweight travel tins, which have a burn time of approx 18-20 +hrs. Contains 220g of soy wax + fragrance + our salty attitude. Our new range comes in white tins from 17 Sep, not black. 

NOTE: Always trim the wick down, otherwise the wick will be like a little mushroom, it'll burn like crap and then you'll be a sooky la la that your candle isn't performing well. So just trim it to 5mm before you burn each time. Oh, and, don't leave a candle unattended. If we don't put stupid disclaimers on things, we'll get sued by someone even stupider.  

Take an Early Knock Off, grab some bath snacks, and restore some balance with this Zen AF magnesium soak. We're saltier than your boss, but you'll love us.

The EKO batch magnesium muscle soak has been formulated to assist in balancing the mind & body. It's your ticket to leave work, check-out and check-in with us, in your tub.

We've boosted this little nugget of gold with rose geranium; known for it's anti-inflammatory and anti-anxiety properties. Ylang-Ylang - which can assist to restore mental balance and invigorate. And, sweet orange essential oil which can help to calm the mind and relieve inflammation. Basically, you'll feel like a relaxed badass who can take on the world after this. 

Mission of this soak: to balance your mind, hormones, and of course - relax your god damn muscles.

• Grab a novel or put on one of John Farnham's 89,000 bangers
• Chuck 2 handfuls of salts into your bath
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for 20 minutes
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you. 

TINY HEROES:

• Magnesium sulfate, bad-ass unicorn vibes, essential oils of rose-geranium, ylang-ylang & sweet orange.

It doesn't matter how much of a cluster-f*ck your day has been. We've got your six. All-day, every day. 

We'll airlift your muscles, skin, and mind out of the danger zone with this invigorating pure essential oil blend topped off with an uplifting minty twist that'll put a pep in your step.
 
This invigorating magnesium soak is boosted with lavender, widely known for its calming properties. Lemon, which can help to rid toxins. Spearmint, known to assist with blood flow and circulation (plus, who doesn't love mint). And, eucalyptus which can help to ease aching, sore, and fatigued muscles. Use the mix as a full-body bath soak, or use a less amount for a detoxing hot foot soak.

Mission of this soak: invigorate and wake you the hell up. Plus, obviously, your muscles will love the shit out of it.

GET NAKED AND:

• Put on am Aussie rock playlist
• Chuck about 2 handfuls into the bath (or a small handful if you're just soaking your feet)
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for 20 minutes
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

TINY HEROES:

• Magnesium sulfate, essential oils of rosemary, lemon, spearmint. 

Long briefing sessions can get fucked, and so can germs - apparently. 

We know that having things go up in flames isn't ideal (like our last relationship). So we've especially sourced an approved broad-spectrum antibacterial hand and surface sanitser that's alcohol-free for those that need to travel or who are at risk of being exposed to open flames (such as mines, in kitchens, industrial facilities). 

Does it protect you 100% from the 'ronas? Absolutely fucking not, we're not miracle workers. 

SIZE: 100ml

INGREDIENTS:

• Purified water, Glycerine, Pentylene Glycol, Benzalkonium Chloride, Cocamidopropyl Betaine, Sodium Chloride.

What's better than a Bunnings snag or your mother-in-law leaving after a visit? Not much.
This sort of comes close.

 
We won't leave you highly strung, rough or edgy. Our milk based magnesium soak has been formulated to gently slough away dead skin cells, which can build up over time thanks to being an adult, wearing a uniform and being a bad-ass motherf*cker every day.

With a kicker of magnesium to assist with relaxing tired and aching muscles and an earthy essential oil infusion of cedarwood, sweet orange, lemon, and lavender, you're going to be a magical fucking beast.

This also can work an absolute bloody treat on your manky, boot-ridden feet. If you don't have a bath just fill a tub or bucket and soak away, amigo.

Mission of this soak: invigorate and calm down pissed off skin.

GET NAKED AND:

• Start your 20-minute playlist
• Chuck a decent handful of powdery milky goodness into a hot bath, or use as a foot soak with half a handful of powder
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for at least 20 mins
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

OUR MVP INGREDIENTS:

As we don’t use shit in our soaks (like preservatives) the milk soak has a short shelf life of 1 month. Or, it’ll smell like shit and be gross. But, you’ve bathed in worse, right? 

• Buttermilk powder, essential oils of cedarwood, orange, lemon and lavender, magnesium sulfate, and the smooth vibes of Lenny Kravitz.

Important: This milk is not for human consumption, do not ingest. If you want fresh milk - go to Coles. We like Battlestar Galactica, not legal battles. 

The only person you've got a date with tonight is us. We'll all be getting naked, soaking in some milky goodness and feeling f*cking great about ourselves. 

We know our tribe train hard, work harder, and are generally covered head to toe in heavy equipment, clothing and sweat. So, we've combined the best of magnesium and milk to calm, repair, and restore your hot little body.

Shit is one thing we're certainly not full of. The Night Op blend has been boosted with the pure essential oils of rose-geranium, ylang-ylang & sweet orange; known for their anti-anxiety, calming & anti-stress properties.

The lactic acid from the milk base of the soak is widely known for its gentle ability to exfoliate away dead skin cells and leave baby soft skin in its wake. All you need to do is chuck a handful in a warm bath, turn your phone off and slay that dead skin away.

Mission of this soak: to restore and balance damaged skin.

GET NAKED AND:

• Whack a decent handful in a warm bath
• Put on some John Legend or Mumford and Son's
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for at least 20 mins
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

INGREDIENTS FOR THE SOUL:

As we don’t use shit in our soaks (like preservatives) the milk soak has a short shelf life of 1 month. Or, it’ll smell like shit and be gross. But, you’ve bathed in worse, right? 

• Buttermilk powder pure essential oils of rose-geranium, ylang-ylang & sweet orange, magnesium sulfate.

Important: This is not food grade milk powder. It is not for human consumption and not for babies. Go to Coles if you want milk. We don't need a lawsuit. #thanks

Yeah, that's right Champ Burger - we wear the pants now, while you take yours off. You can't pull rank with us in this tub.

Get your frowny, angry and salty attitude into the tub with our motherfucking spicy blend of fennel, cinnamon bark and, black pepper.  

This new batch has been formulated with natural extracts to assist with deep muscle recovery, blood flow, and circulation so that your body can wake the hell up. 

The mission of this soak: work deep into tense muscles and promote tissue repair.

• Leave the group chat
  
• Lock the door
• Chuck about 2 handfuls into the bath (or a small handful if you're just soaking your feet)
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for 20 minutes
• Feel slightly more human (results may vary)
• Repeat a few times a week. 
• Email DHA and tell them they need to increase their average bath size.

TINY HEROES:

• Magnesium sulfate, sweet orange, clove leaf, fennel, cinnamon bark, black pepper, cardamom.

Speaking of new products. Did you know we've also got brand new Illumination Rounds?

We're ok with you using us after your ex(ercise). We'll be gentle with you and only do good things to your body...

With a soothing and calming essential oil base of chamomile, cedarwood, and lavender this trio of forces will combat dry, tired and shitty skin. 

With the ultra-gentle non-gritty exfoliant of lactic acid (from the milk base) this non-chemical, and non-abrasive solution will fuck dead skin cells right off. You'll be left feeling velvety soft and...plot twist...we've added magnesium so your muscles also get some lovin' along the way. 

When days are long, f*cktardary is high, and getting a morning coffee is one of the only moments that spark joy, we'll bail you out.  As we don’t use shit in our soaks (like preservatives) the milk soak has a short shelf life of approx 1 month. Or, it’ll smell like shit and be gross. But, you’ve bathed in worse, right? 

GET NAKED AND:

• Chuck a decent handful of powdery milky goodness into a hot bath
• Calm the f*ck down and anchor for at least 20 mins
• Feel slightly more human
• Repeat twice a week. Or don't. We're not the boss of you

INGREDIENTS:

These ingredients are more satisfying than decent f*cking WiFi connection.  

• Buttermilk powder, pure essential oils of chamomile, cedarwood, sweet orange and lavender, magnesium sulfate.

Important: This is not food grade milk powder. Do not ingest it, do not make milo with it, do not take it out field to drink and above all, do not sell it on the black market as baby formula or give it to infants. We prefer not to spend out profit on legal fees, due to stupidity. #thankyouandgoodnight

Oh, look, shit for the shower.

We discriminated against 70% of you when we only had muscle soaks available. So now you can stop fucking complaining. Mag Shower Gel is here. 

SIZE: 250ml

Our Lights Out Mag Gel is a liquid version (duh) of our Lights Out Mag Soak, meaning that it's calming, soothing, and great before bed. Our super thick and paraben-free shower gel base has been boosted with magnesium chloride (the same magnesium in our mag spray), to help ease tense and crappy muscles. It's infused with lavender to calm you the fuck down and chamomile to knock you out. 

This won't fix your fucked back or muscles instantly (it's not Mag Spray), however, it's mild enough to use daily, and we recommend using Mag Spray post-shower on the extra fucky areas as can provide rapid relief.

We're not giving you usage instructions. Because, dead set - if we need to go that far, we need to have a bigger talk.

INGREDIENTS: 

The only thing better than these ingredients is getting that Leave App signed.

Purified Aqua, Decyl Glucoside, Magnesium Chloride, Cocamido Propyl Betaine, PEG-120 Methyl Glucose Dioleate, Propylene Glycol, Diazolidinyl Urea (and) Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate, Lavandula angustifolia (lavender), Bergamot calabrian, Citrus reticulata (mandarin), Citrus Limon (lemon), Anthemis nobilis and Cedrus atlantica (cedarwood).

Time to wake up, motherfucker.

Since the majority of you don't have a bath you'll fit into, we've got the shower goods for the shower salt lords.  

SIZE: 250ml

The Reveille Mag Shower Gel has been formulated to give you that kick up the ass you need, with a blend that will get the blood flowing and muscle tension melting. It's the right-hand man of our Reveille Mag Muscle Soak packed with black pepper, cardamom, and deep spice. (And no, dickheads, it won't burn your balls - because we get asked that a lot......like, why the fuck would we make something like that? Unless, you use the Mag Spray below the belt - that shit will burn and itch like a fucker).

Our sulfate and paraben free shower gel is mild enough to use daily. For a heavy hit on easing up muscles and general shitness, we strongly recommend the heavy hitters being the Mag Spray and Muscle Soaks. 

We're not giving you usage instructions. Because, dead set - if we need to go that far, we need to have a bigger talk.

INGREDIENTS: 

No shit decisions were made when creating this. (Could you even imagine a workplace where constant shit decisions were made.............)

Purified Aqua, Decyl Glucoside, Magnesium Chloride, Cocamido Propyl Betaine, PEG-120 Methyl Glucose Dioleate, Propylene Glycol, Diazolidinyl Urea (and) Iodopropynyl Butylcarbamate, Citrus sinensis (orange), Eugenia Caryophyllata (clove), Foeniculum vulgare dulce (fennel), Piper nigrum (black pepper), Elettaria cardamomum (cardamom) and, Cinnamomum zeylanicum (cinnamon).

This will be total shower carnage.

Our Mag + Coffee Shower Dirt will turn your shower into a fucking war zone. On the plus side, you'll feel like a magical warlord afterwards.

Size: 150g

We could waffle on about how good this shit is but let's keep it simple, so you can all take notes with your crayons. 

This shower scrub is now a permanent member of the Armoury. With a coffee base and mag base, it'll slay away the toughest and roughest of skin leaving it feelin' silky thanks to a concentrated formula of vitamin e from green coffee seed extract, sweet almond oil, and grapeseed oil. It's not going to fix doms or help with aches and pains (it's not a fucking muscle soak or mag spray), but it will help fade stretch marks, scars, and damaged skin when used regularly. 

Just don't leave it on for too long - because, hi. It's fuckin' coffee and it'll stain your skin and life. Don't say we didn't warn you because we have. 

INGREDIENTS: 

These ingredients are nearly more active than the QPS Social Account.

Coffea arabica seed powder, magnesium sulfate (mag salt), magnesium chloride (mag salt, but stronger), Prunus Amygdalus Dulcis (Sweet Almond Oil), Vitis Vinifera Seed Oil (Grapeseed Oil), Soja hispida (Soy Bean Oil), Coffea arabica L (Green Coffee Seed) AKA shit that's amazing for your skin, Tocopherol, Citrus Aurantium Dulcis, Citrus Limo (lemon).

Shipping is a bitch this festive season - so cut the crap and just buy a gift card.

Available in AUD only #sorry.